Having flown 30,000 miles in the past 3 weeks, I am convinced of three things:
(1) Flying 30,000 miles in 3 weeks is a profoundly stupid thing to do.
(2) If you are that stupid and you suffer from chronic acid reflux, there is no better investment of your miles than an upgrade to the “sleeping on a mountainside” seats available in international business class. They are ostensibly less luxurious than the truly (i.e., parallel to the floor) lie flat seats of first class, but from a stomach acid viewpoint they are infinitely superior. Because many people do not want to sleep on a jacked-up bed next to their reflux-afflicted spouse, the individualized sleeping solution these seats provide could save a few marriages if they could be purchased for the home. I can see the ad campaign: “Had a spicy dinner? Ate too quickly? Why make your spouse suffer when you can fly business class? In your own bedroom.”
(3) The inflight magazine occupies an unique place in the world of publishing. Because it’s not available to the general public, reading it should feel like a privilege. After all, you have to buy an airplane ticket just to look at it. But because passengers frequently read the inflight magazine when they are bored stiff and there is no other choice available, it often doesn’t feel like a privilege or even a choice at the time. Inflight magazines thus combine the thrilling exclusiveness of a high-priced private sector product with the subjective resentment and poor quality reputation of a low cost public sector product. No mean feat.
Inflight magazines are, to me, one of the world’s great mysteries. They are worthless as reading material, yet all the airlines have them, and advertisers seem to be willing to buy space in these incredibly boring publications. What’s going on?
Thanks for the tip about acid reflux. Travel stress and airline food tends to accentuate it.
Keith,
My mother suffered from a hiatal hernia and the accompanying GIR. She and my dad purchased the best (i.e., most comfortable for sleeping) recliner they could find, and she slept in that for several years. She finally bit the bullet and had corrective surgery, and can sleep in a bed now. The recliner allowed them to stay in the same room, and for 80-somethings that’s important. When my dad had his heart attack, she heard him get up not return to bed in a timely fashion. That got her to check on him and call 911, and that saved him.
Hi Dennis — my idea comes too late, someone else figured it out first (If you want new ideas, read old books…).
Very happy to hear it worked out so well for your folks.
Have you looked at what air travel does to your carbon footprint? My family looks incredibly, greenly virtuous — until you take that into account. And we don’t even travel all that much.